I went to Quest Diagnostics the other day to finally have my blood drawn for testing.

I received this prescription exactly one month ago.  Nice that I finally went.

I needed to fast from the night before (midnight to be exact). I did not place a morsel of food in my mouth since 9:30 PM. I woke up at 8:30 (later than I wanted), took my shower and was about to go to the lab. I checked my calendar and realized I missed my OB-GYN appointment (explanation in another post)! I call to reschedule that – they tell me to come in at 11:30.

After my appointment – still starving – I head to the lab for my blood to be drawn.

I arrive there at 12:50 PM. I read the Reader’s Digest from cover to cover! I wait patiently for them to call my name.

Some time later they call my number and I follow the man into the room.  He stares directly at my chest and I think to myself, “here we go”. I get nervous because I tend to get queasy when blood is drawn and sometimes I even faint. Now I have absolutely no nutrition in me whatsoever. “Will he take advantage?” I laugh to myself and tell myself to get a grip!

He checks for the right arm vein. He tells me to make a fist, he laughs at the fist I make. He mentions for me not to stab myself (with my nails clenching into my fist). He says he knows I can make a fist because he knows I have to punch all the men. He has a thick accent so I struggle to understand what he is saying.

Then he moves on to the left arm – due to my recommendation. He finds a good vein. He laughs that I am looking away. Questions why I don’t want to watch. I tell him, “No. No good – I can’t stand to watch,” and I make a face. He then looks like he is trying to make conversation – at least he is looking at me and not my nearly “DDD”s. So I decide to be pleasant (because I could be b!tchy).

He asks what color hair do I have, do I call it black. We struggle with this question as I am not sure if he is asking about my hair color or skin tone. I am not sure still if I admitted to being black skinned! I am tan, but I think he can tell I am Caucasian. He goes on to tell me that I am a beautiful woman (blush). And he proceeds with this story (in broken English):

There once was this director that spotted a beautiful Mexican woman washing clothes at the river. She had flowing long black hair. Curls. Like mine. He approached the woman and said that she is exactly what he is looking for to play a part in his new movie. She gets so excited, goes home and tells everyone. She then proceeds to do something so ridiculous. Due to others encouragement and their perception of “Hollywood” types, she dyes her hair blonde and cuts it short. She shows up in Hollywood only to realize she disappointed this director. He tells he no, he made a mistake. He thought she was perfect for the role. He needed a dark haired natural woman to play this part and now she ruined her look. She was no longer needed.

Moral of the story: Be pleased with who you are! Well that is what I took it for. Anyway, he says once again how beautiful I am as he hands me the urine cup for a sample! I go to the bathroom and return. I hand him the vial and go on my merry way.

But I must tell you about the blood. He took 3 vials of blood and while he was telling his story and filling the last vial I look over to the table holding the other two and got sick to my stomach. In the vile was this thick red blood and what settled onto the bottom of it was what made me cringe. It was yellowish and really thick – it looked like the fat that gels from the bottom of a pan that held pork or chicken fat for too long.

Was that the fat or cholesterol in my blood? Was it something worse? All I know was that it was disgusting looking and I was slightly embarrassed. Time will tell what it is as I should be getting my results in a few days. Until then, I don’t even have the time to worry about it.

I didn’t discuss that with my husband but I did tell him that a man thought I was beautiful. As I expected, he got upset and jealous! I told him, “well it was nice to hear that SOMEONE thinks I am beautiful.” NOTE: you know sometimes you need to hear it. I don’t know why it is important, but it is.

He answers back by telling me he tells everyone he meets that he has a beautiful wife and shows them my HS graduation picture from 20 years ago!! Can you get an updated photo! I changed drastically since then! And by the way – you need to tell me once in a while too! or instead!